Christmas day has come and gone. Santa brought me a shiny silver Corvette. How in the world did he get that into his little-red-bag? Quite a feat I’d say…

Christmas – what an extra burden on the local land-fills – piled high with tons of wrapping paper, bows, boxes, Christmas trees, and broken toys. And that’s saying nothing about the millions of toxic batteries that are dumped – a small price to pay for all of the sharing and love being spread around for a whole day.

Enough of that, how about the 12 Days of Christmas? Most people think it is the 12 Days leading up to Christmas, however Nina E set me straight with great enthusiasm and fervor. It’s actually the 12 Days after Christmas. Starting the 26th of December and going through Epiphany on January 6th.

What the heck is Epiphany anyway? It’s the day the three wise guys showed up to give baby Jesus those expensive gifts – They must have hauled ass to get there in 12 Days on camels coming from the Orient afar.

Some church authorities say 12 Days of Christmas is December 25th through January 5th – Religion can be so confusing!

And how about that song “The 12 Days of Christmas”?

It’s an English Christmas carol, but might be originally French. The modern version was concocted in 1909 by the English composer Frederic Austin, who also added 5 Gold Rings to the song. I wonder what it was before – how about 5 hemp bracelets?

My favorite verse is eight maids a milking – what a wonderful visual, eight young, lovely maids in my living room milking cows… You can’t beat that.

-Wit Waltman


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